Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Stream of Consciousness

Yeah, I know all of you hate these Larry-King-stream-of-consciousness posts. You'll just have to deal with it.

I'm back in my old hometown for the long holiday weekend. Whenever I go out, I always wonder if I will run into any of my old friends from high school. I pretty much cut myself off from all of them when I moved away so most of them don't know much about what I've done with myself over the last ten or fifteen years. If I run into anyone, I'd really like to tell them that I'm on my fourth marriage, I'm being sued for child support by a woman I got pregnant between marriages three and four, that I did a brief stretch in prison for running a meth lab but that I've pretty much cleaned up my act and now I have a great job at a tallow processing plant.

I was at Walmart earlier and I noticed that a lot of people were wearing red, white and blue clothing in honor of the 4th. I looked down at myself and found that, quite accidentally, I had worn blue and white. No red however. It occurred to me that if I tied a red scarf around my neck.. I then remembered that I'm straight.

One of the things I hate about Goodwill is that they dramatically overprice their items. I mean, they are getting their inventory for free so it shouldn't be that hard to make a profit. Why then are they trying to sell a Pentium II with a 14 inch monitor for $399? Anyhoo, my local Goodwill is going to be opening a bookstore. Now, that seems like a fine idea. The problem is that they plan on selling most books for about 2/3s of retail price... 2/3 of retail for a book that may have been puked on or read in the can somewhere along the way. Does that make any sense at all??? Most books at Amazon or any other online retailer sell for that amount or less brand new. Why on earth would I pay the same price for a used book that I pay for a brand new one?

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