Sunday, August 30, 2009

Why The Postman Sucked

The Postman (1997)

Yeah, I know... How much time have you got?

No, here's at least one reason why it sucked... The ending.

I mean, I'm all for happy endings. I like all the loose ends tied up. Still, in the course of 30 years we're supposed to have gone from Mad Max to a scene that looks like Marin County?

And, I'm sorry, but the whole Amy Grant/Kevin Costner love song during the closing credits? I really like Amy Grant and, yes, it's a sweet little song (owing more to Amy's sweet voice and a tender arrangement than to the lyrics which are sort of insipid), but... Again... Not the best fit with a post-apocalyptic tale of man reduced to brute.

There was a little period, post Dances With Wolves, when Kevin Costner was way, way, way over-indulged. The result was The Postman and Waterworld.




You Didnt Have To Be So Nice - Amy grant & Kevin Costner

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Sure, Drag Out the Kids

I'm sorry, but I have to say this...

Having the kiddies come out at Uncle Teddy's funeral and having them mouth liberal platitudes in the form of "intercessions" strikes me as being in piss-poor taste.  When they put me in the cold, cold earth I don't want my grandkids praying that they cut the capital gains tax.

Okay, and now that the dam has broken...

Rory Kennedy looks EXACTLY like her old man...  Only with long blonde hair...  That's not a good thing.

The fat little Kennedy male grandkid with the long hair...  Not liking that.

And from last night...  John McCain doesn't have much emotion left in him, it seems.  Maybe that was a coping mechanism from when the North Vietnamese were ripping his fingernails out.  I don't know.  Still, it makes him seem odd at poignant moments.  And he doesn't have the politician's gift/curse of faking it well.

Wondering if Obama will take communion.  He shouldn't, of course...  Nor should Bubba, Peanuts or, for that matter, Dubya.  Literally the body and blood of Christ, folks.  If you don't believe it, don't nibble the wafer.  These papists are hard core.

Wondering about the alterboy-or-whatever with the long beard.  Wouldn't have taken him for Catholic.  Latvian Orthodox maybe.

Dubya looks either bored, sad or both while Yo-Yo is playing.

That dress Michelle Obama wore getting off the plane last night looked like she ought to be at a Mexican cantina.  Yeah, it was dark, but a little festive for traveling to a funeral, don't you think?  Hey, if the Washington Post can criticize fashion, why can't we?

You know, I'm a Baptist but I see the value in all this ritual.  I think it feeds a human need much more than any sort of divine desire.  And say what you want, they know how to build a church.  No General Steel buildings for them.

By the way, you think Hillary cringed when the priest almost dared refer to her as Mrs. rather than Secretary Clinton.  From Botswana to Boston, girlfriend can't catch a break.

Well, as far as I could tell, I don't think Obama took communion.  Looked like he stood up to let Joe and Jill Biden out.  Good call, Barry.

Hey, Patrick, we don't need to hear about your legislative accomplishments.

Not Bright, Charlie

Crist taps ex-aide to replace U.S. Sen. Mel Martinez

Not bright at all.

We all know that you were picking a placeholder. We all know that the goal was to cater to one constituency or another. We all know that picking a strong voice for Florida was not the top priority.

Still, did you not think about how this would come across? Crist picks aide to fill Senate seat! Crist names loyalist to Senate! Do you really want to have charges of cronyism leveled at you?

Remember how Harriet Miers worked out for Dubya? Yeah, not a great idea to repeat that one, Chuck.

Friday, August 28, 2009

The MediaBlog Picks to Click: Friday

8:00 - Supernanny

Yeah, I know. Mrs. MediaBlog has to have one show, right?

Thursday, August 27, 2009

The MediaBlog Picks to Click: Thursday

Okay, finally we actually have a little action. Naturally, the network pinheads took all of the decent shows and stuck them on one night. If you have a dual tuner Tivo then you... Actually, you're still screwed.

8:00 - Flash Forward
8:00 - Survivor
8:30 - Parks and Recreation
9:00 - CSI
9:00 - The Office
9:30 - Community

There Is A Time For Everything

Edward Moore Kennedy
1932 - 2009

And this is the time for only one thing...

Our heartfelt condolences to the Kennedy family and friends.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Do You Think God Might Be Trying to Tell You Something, Barry?

The MediaBlog Picks to Click: Wednesday

It's not getting much better tonight, friends... Well, at least we can unreservedly endorse our schedule for tonight... Brief though it is..

9:00 - Glee

Yeah, I know. Seriously, give it a shot. You may think the music is corny (barbarian!) but you've got to like the Freaks and Geeks vibe. Well worth your time. And it's not like there is much else on, right?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

A Tale of Two Summers

Top reformist confesses in Iran political trial - Yahoo! News

In Iran, the mullahs are conducting a show trial for those who dared cross the regime. Today featured a leader of the reform movement who survived an assassination attempt but was left partially paralyzed and barely able to speak. He was made to stand up and confess his "crimes". He asked for forgiveness and agreed that the rule of Iran's supreme leader is the rule of God on Earth.

Meanwhile, there are unconfirmed reports that the Leader of the Free World triple bogeyed the the second at Mink Meadows on Martha's Vineyard.

If you're not ashamed, you're not paying attention.

The MediaBlog Picks to Click: Tuesday

We now move on to Tuesday...

Seriously... Have you given any more thought to that Netflix thing we mentioned yesterday? Okay, fine, whatever...

8:00 - 90210

Yeah, that's what we were trying to tell you. And, no, we're not going to be watching Melrose Place. We have at least a little pride.

Monday, August 24, 2009

The MediaBlog Picks to Click: Monday

It's that time of year again, friends. Where we save you the trouble of thinking and just tell you how to program your Tivo. No, don't thank us. Just click the links.

We begin with Monday. This won't take long...

9:30 - Big Bang Theory
10:00 - CSI: Miami

Like we said, won't take long. So what are you supposed to do with the other 90 minutes in primetime? You could read a good book. Talk with your loved ones.

Yeah, I know. Silly. Have you considered Netflix?

Saturday, August 22, 2009

I Know This Is In Poor Taste, But...

Am I the only one who thinks that murdered chick looks like an anime character?

I mean, she may have had a great body but that was one spooky face.

That being said, hopefully they find the sick fuck who did it.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Here's A Democrat I'd Be Proud to Vote For

Milwaukee mayor hospitalized after pipe attack - Yahoo! News

Mayor Tom Barrett of Milwaukee saw an old woman and a baby being assaulted by a 20 year old guy. Instead of just walking away this fellow takes a stand. He gets hit in the head with a pipe and punches the attacker so hard he fractures his hand.

Geezer and baby are fine and the mayor is hospitalized but expected to recover.

Good job, Mayor Barrett. Milwaukee should be proud.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Once Again... Heck of a Job, Zuckie!

Breaking News - "LATE SHOW" REPEATS BEAT "TONIGHT SHOW" ORIGINALS! | TheFutonCritic.com

You know, the truth of the matter is that I like Conan. I honestly do. Certainly much more than I ever liked Jay Leno. In fact, at this point I prefer Conan to Letterman and that's just about television sacrilege in my book. Still, there it is.

No, this is about yet another triumph by the brain trust that runs NBC. You know the saying about how generals are always fighting the last war? Well, that's what Jeff Zucker and his company of fools did. They read The Late Shift (an excellent book, by the way) and decided not to have a messy succession this time around. So, they dumped/"promoted" Jay and moved Conan up.

Sure has worked out well, huh?

Follow the Light!

Remember the Bluelight Special?

It was something of a fixture of my childhood.  That blue light over in the corner of K-Mart pointing the way toward a great deal.  Well, they have brought it back.  Everything old is new again!

In fact, it is not just back, it is better than ever.  For one day only, Saturday, August 15th, you can get some amazing deals at your local K-Mart.  They will be having special offers throughout the store on an amazing variety of products.  Everything from patio furniture to grills to jewelry and much, much more.  All of it at amazing Bluelight prices.

There will be over 40 great Bluelight Specials throughout the day and the savings aren't only at your local K-Mart, they are also available at kmart.com.

Need a back to school backpack for your student?  Kmart has them in your favorite brands.  Regularly priced at $19.99 they are on sale for the Bluelight price of $8.  Eight bucks for a backpack?  Amazing!  And get some notebooks to fill up that backpack.  Buy 2 and you get 1 free!

Maybe you are ready to do a little early Christmas shopping for your wife or girlfriend.  Diamond jewelry is already 70% off right now and will be an extra 10% off on Saturday.

All these deal and so many more.  All of them a part of the celebration for the return of the Kmart Bluelight.  You can find out more by clicking on the link above or, if you would like, you can find out more about the great deals and surprises by following Kmart on Twitter.

Click Here

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Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Barry to Michigan: Fuck You!

AP source: Obama officials to tour Michigan prison - Yahoo! News

You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have...

So, on the positive side, Barry bailed out GM and Chrysler.

On the negative, he's getting ready to dump hundreds of unrepentant terrorists on the Great Lake State.

Michiganders, when 2012 rolls around, remember that Barry cares more about keeping terrorists comfortable and indulging his liberal base then he does about your safety, security and peace of mind.

Maybe Barry Needs To Order Another Round

US official gropes to explain Clinton's outburst - Yahoo! News

Since Barack is so big on getting together over a cold one in order to bring about racial harmony, maybe he needs to break out a six pack for Hillary and this Congolese fellow.

I think the bigger question is when we can expect Hillary Clinton to offer an apology for blowing her cool and snapping at an African non-American who was asking an innocent question.

Madam Secretary? Isn't it time for you to begin the healing?

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Well Done, Good and Faithful Servant

Eunice Kennedy Shriver, Hero of the Antiabortion Movement - God & Country (usnews.com)

Not the time for comparisons, but while certain other people were getting the glory (and were getting themselves into all sorts of mischief), Eunice Kennedy Shriver lived out her faith, made our world better for the disabled and stood firm for the cause of life.

Quickly! A Kleenex For Mr. Beck!



Glenn had one of his crying jags today.  At least this time it was over his daughter who has cerebral palsy.  He was going off on making some connection between Nazi eugenics and Obamacare.  All the while, of course, being sure to point out that eugenics and Nazis have nothing to do with this.  No, certainly not.  Why would you think that he is comparing Barack Obama to der fuhrer?  No, certainly not.  Parish the thought.

Look, I think Glenn Beck is a very sincere person.  While I have offered up the possibility that he might be a cynical showman, I don't really believe it.  Showman?  Yes.  Cynical?  No.  I think Glenn genuinely believes what he says.  I think his emotions are genuine.  I'm sure his tears over his daughter are real.  In fact, I wouldn't have much use for a man who doesn't get choked up when he thinks about how special his little girl is.

All of that being said, the fact that he is genuine doesn't make him one bit less crazy.  Nor does it make him any more of a useful part of this dialogue regarding government health care.  There are a thousand and one good reasons to oppose the kind of government-directed health system the Democrats are trying to ram down our throats, but talking about "death panels" and suggesting that a bureaucrat is going to have your granny dragged to his office in handcuffs for some mandatory end of life counseling or making tangential connections to the Final Solution really doesn't help.

For that matter, it doesn't help to be heckling Congresscritters.  Yeah, they're full of shit, but is that anything new?  Of course, it would probably be for the best if Nancy Pelosi and her ilk weren't comparing conservatives to Nazis, too.  Can we all just declare a moratorium on Third Reich references for the duration?

Monday, August 10, 2009

Bollywood Has Nothing On Us!

Considering that we're a small media market in the middle of nowhere, we do pretty well by ourselves in the newsbabe hotness category. Not only do we have the blonde goddess of the panhandle, Lauren Dorsett, we also have the weather hottie from the sub-continent Sheena Samanipour.

For your enjoyment...

Temper, Temper

Clinton: I'm secretary of state, not Bill - Yahoo! News

Sometimes you almost... Almost... Have to feel bad for Hillary Clinton. Her entire life she has been getting screwed (figuratively if not literally) by men.

Obviously we all know that Bubba has spent... What... 30 years more or less humiliating her. Still, it was all worth it because she was going to be President. It was her turn!

Except that it turned out that Barry Obama jumped ahead in line. But it would be okay for Hillary because she would be Secretary of State... An important world figure!

Except that she made the mistake of becoming Secretary of State at a moment in history when the entire country was turned inward. Under a President who picked special envoys to handle all of the really juicy spots. Who even sent Bubba off to pick up chicks in North Korea while Hillary shook her thunder thighs in the armpit of Third World Africa.

So, for all those reasons, I guess we can understand why Hillary is a little testy these days. Still, isn't there something just a little pathetic about going off on some poor Congolese university student who dared to ask her for her husband's thoughts on something.

Poor Hillary. It's got to be rough when you think you're in the spotlight and the only thing people ever want is for you to get them Bubba's autograph.

Sunday, August 09, 2009

Robin Givhan Is An Idiot

Givhan On Culture: In North Korea, Clinton Didn't Wear His Heart on His Sleeve - washingtonpost.com

Or maybe she isn't. I mean, she's just writing what the geniuses at the Washington Post want her to write. Maybe that makes whoever is running the Post these days the idiot.

At any rate, there is something laughable (or pathetic) about Givhan writing articles about Dick Cheney's choice of outerware at Auschwitz and Hillary Clinton's cleavage.

Now, Ms. Givhan has turned her talents (such as they are) to an in-depth analysis of the clothing worn by President Clinton and Kim Jong Il during their recent tete-a-tete.

This Is A Fox News Alert


Newsflash for Julie Banderas and the good folks at Fox. What you see above is not, repeat not, an image from the new Kepler telescope. If you were not idiots you would have realized that.

Why can't the hot ones be smart?

Two-fer Tuesday Two Days Early







Yeah, it's Sunday. You want to make something of it? Or maybe I should just keep these to myself?

I didn't think so...

Blogporn Dump

Everybody wastes so much of your time with words. Jabber, jabber, jabber. Not here, friends. Here we give you what you want:

Saturday, August 08, 2009

You Know What Sucks

I'll tell you what sucks.  It sucks to get up on Saturday morning, flip on ye olde Tivo and expect to have a couple of pleasurable hours ogling the perfectly formed calf muscles of a woman who wouldn't give me the time of day only to find that she has decided to take the day off and let the spastic softball player fill in.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Great Food, Great Fun

Hungry for a great sandwich?

Along with all of their other delicious offerings, Stouffer's has four new panini sandwiches that will have your mouth watering.  You can select from Bistro Meatballs & Peppers, Bistro Chicken Souvlaki, Lean Cuisine Grilled Vegetables & Goat Cheese or, Lean Cuisine Mango Chicken Tikka.

Better yet, right now they are celebrating the introduction of these great new sandwiches with a contest where you can win some amazing prizes.  What do I mean by amazing prizes?  Let me run a few examples past you...  How does $10000 in cash sound?  Or maybe a Sony Digital Camcorder?  You can also win coupons for free products from Stouffer's.  Talk about amazing prizes!

Of course, there is always the fine print.  Just a few rules for you to keep in mind.  There is one free entry every day.  In addition to that, you can also get one more entry each day using a UPC code from your favorite Stouffer's product.  Now, this contest is only open to our Canadian friends.

Interested in finding out more about the great tastes of  Stouffers-panini sandwiches and the great prizes from the Stouffer's contest?  You can register here.

Great food, great value, great prizes.  That is Stouffer's!

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The Times Have Changed

How we used to deal with Asian despots who pissed us off:


How we handle them now:

Monday, August 03, 2009

Classes Are Coming

I would like to take a moment to tell you about how Sears can help you get ready for school this Fall. This post was sponsored by Sears. All the opinions are mine.

The older I get the shorter Summer seems to be. Back when I was in school, whether elementary, high school or college, Summer seemed to last a good long while. No more. Anyway, time is running out. Classes will be starting soon and it is important to be ready. Sears can help you do that.

If you visit the CampusReady section of Sears website you can find products and information that will make sure you are ready for classes on day one.

You can shop by dorm room and find plenty of products to suit your space and style. They have a collection of products that will coordinate along with tips and ideas which can help you spruce up that dorm room and make it your own. Use their checklist to make sure you have everything you need and if mom and dad are going to be helping out there is a list of items for them too.

Along with stocking your crib (yeah, I know... it sounds silly when people my age try to talk that way)... Sears' website can give you tips for financial planning and making the most of your buck. A college education is expensive and you want to make the most of your money. And they can help you find great clothes that suit your style so you'll look your best.

Want a little help making the transition from high school senior to College freshman? It can be a big transition going from top of the heap to new fish... CampusReady on Facebook is Sears' Facebook page that can help you make the transition a little smoother.

To top it off, Sears can help out a little with that tuition... You can enter for a chance to win money toward your child's tuition: $25000 courtesy of Sears and Upromise! If you are a member of Upromise then you are already entered or you can enter for free at sears.com/campusready.

That first class is right around the corner. Let Sears help you get ready.

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Saturday, August 01, 2009

Some Things Don't Stand the Test of Time

Top Gun (1986)

I find it almost impossible to enjoy Top Gun now that Maverick is a kook, Iceman is fat, Goose is bald and Charlie is a lesbian. The fact that I now realize you can cut the homosexual tension with a knife in the locker room scenes sort of takes away from the macho vibe too.

And it doesn't help that they've retired the Tomcat. It was my favorite fighter growing up. Yes, I was the kind of kid who had a favorite fighter aircraft. Is it any wonder I was a virgin until last Tuesday?