Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Just When You Thought It Couldn't Get Stranger

Not satisfied with being sponsored by food insurance, non-hybrid seeds and, of course, gold, Glenn Beck has finally created the perfect storm of paranoia.  Tonight during his Fox show we went straight from a Goldline commercial into one for Tim LaHaye's latest version of literary Armageddon, Edge of Apocalypse.

You know, I slogged my way through Tim's Left Behind Series.  I'm not entirely sure why I did so except that I wanted to see how off the wall it would get.  And I say that as a Christian who attends a reasonably conservative Southern Baptist church.  I'm hardly some screaming atheist.  They were awful books.  Wooden and...  Well, just awful.  Even though he has a new co-author, I find it hard to imagine that the new one is any better.

I don't begrudge any man his daily bread, but I kind of think that Tim LeHaye's books are really very little more than apocalypse porn.  And lousy apocalypse porn at that.

Anyway, the Beck train to kookytown picks up speed.

There's No Accounting for Taste

You know, I really don't know why more of you people aren't reading this blog.  Check out my 7th Heaven and monkey posts.  Damn funny stuff there.

Monday, April 26, 2010


We've failed you. We let our guard down. It's been something like 7 months since we last updated you on the monkey threat. Well, friends, a lot can happen in 7 months... And a lot has.

While we've been sitting here, ogling Miss Martha and worrying about what sort of abomination the Colonel is going to add to his menu, the monkeys have been planning.  They are dramatically more dangerous than they were last Fall.

As you can see above, they now have a powerful ally.  Not just bears...  No, my friends, something much worse.  Bears by themselves would be frightening enough...  Sharp teeth...  Claws...  What could be more terrifying?

Two words: bear cavalry

Faster than the average bear, these mounted shock troops will be on us before you can say, "Hey, Boo-Boo!"  Things are getting very dark, friends.  Very dark indeed.  If you believe in God then please...  Please...  Pray for more time.

Enough With the Stick, Time for the Carrot

APNewsBreak: East Jerusalem construction frozen - Yahoo! News

We were probably one of the few conservative outlets to at least sympathize and, to be honest, probably agree with the Administration's decision to put the screws to Israel. You can't let other nations, even and maybe especially allies, think that they can shit on your plate without you giving a little back. Either intentionally or through exceptionally poor control of his government ministers, Benjamin Netanyahu screwed Plugs Biden and that had to receive a response.

Now that they seem to have shown their belly, it's time to do a rapid 180 and show the love.

Of course, it would be nice if Obama could be equally tough with foes.

Weak Horses and Strong Horses

Creators of 'Everybody Draw Muhammad Day' drop gag after everybody gets angry | Top of the Ticket | Los Angeles Times

They can drop it if they like, I doubt many others will. This isn't about what you think of Muhammad. This is about having the freedom to say things that may be rude without being afraid that someone will murder you.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Mark Your Calendars

Okay, So Maybe Here Not So Much

We've always said that Plugs looks... Well... I think the phrase we used was DAMN presidential.

Yeah, about that...

A Stunning Confession

Ancient Aliens — History.com TV Episodes, Schedule, & Video

I've got to admit that I love stuff like this. Chariots of the Gods, ancient astronauts... It's all hooey, of course, but I love it.

Good Riddance

Epoch Times - Crowd Gathers To Watch Texas Stadium Demolition

I haven't cared about the NFL since the late 1980s. However, during the 80s I was a reasonably big Cowboys fan. At least, as big of a fan as an awkward kid with little-to-no athletic skills could be. I think my interest pretty much died when they kicked Tom Landry to the curb in favor of Jimmy Johnson.

You know... Jimmy Johnson... The douche with the plastered-down hair who apparently can't get it up without popping a pill...

Anyhoo... I was a Cowboys fan. I always hated their stadium though. Never been to a game but hated it. Why? That damned hole in the roof. Yeah, I guess it let them have real grass but it made for hellish TV on late afternoon games. The shadows were terrible. I would imagine it was rough to play there too. I mean, if you're throwing from dark into light or whatever.

Anyway, it's gone now. Unloved and unmourned.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

This Is Why Conan Had To Go First

If they let George Lopez go first Conan's show wouldn't start until 1:30am.

Geez, how long is this bit going to go on?

How Much More of This Do We Have to Put Up With?

Steele: No reason for black GOP base - Andy Barr - POLITICO.com

Michael Steele told a group of Black students that they "don't have a reason" to vote Republican because Republicans "haven’t done a very good job of giving you one.” This comes after his comments last year saying that some white Republicans are "scared" of him.

How much more of this clown are we going to have to take? In a year that has all the hallmarks of a Republican landslide, this douche seems to never miss a chance to stick his foot in his mouth.

Newsflash, Mikey... Black people have the same reasons to vote for Republicans as white people. Why do you believe that Black people don't have an interest in limited government? In the sanctity of life and marriage? In lower taxes and more freedom? Or do you think we need to be giving them more? Do you think that we need to find some way to break people into ethnic interest groups and then buy them off?

MediaBlog HQ got a piece of fundraising mail from the RNC today. It had Michael Steele's name on it. It went in the trash.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Maybe If They Cast Their Nets on the Other Side

Israel bans Sea of Galilee fishing

Steers and Queers

Cause if there's one thing country music fans really care about it's transgender rights.

Smooth, Bubba... Very Smooth

Bill Clinton: Hillary & me too old for SCOTUS - POLITICO Live - POLITICO.com

I'm sure Bill is way past the point where he worries about pissing off the little woman. And, of course, in the grand scheme of things he's done far worse to her. Still, do you really think suggesting your wife is old is the best way to maintain peace in Chappagua.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Saying It Better Than I Could

One of my core beliefs about the Left is that their fundamental flaw is holding to the idea that we have it within our power to make of this world a paradise. Utopian dreaming of this sort always, always ends in blood.

I read tonight a quote from Adam Michnik, a Polish dissident, that sums it up far more eloquently than I could:
"And my obsession has been that we should have a revolution that does not resemble the French or Russian, but rather the American, in the sense that it be for something, not against something. A revolution for a constitution, not a paradise. An anti-utopian revolution. Because utopias lead to the guillotine and the gulag."
If you give to the State the power to create the world of your dreams you give them the power to bring your nightmares to life.

Monday, April 12, 2010

For the Evening Gown Competition She Wore A White Sheet... But It Was Fitted!

FOXNews.com - Miss. Confederate History Month ignores slavery

Um... You think maybe it might have been a good idea to go with MS rather than Miss?

And I For One Welcome Our New Satanic Overlord

The Washington Post: To achieve Mideast peace, Obama must make a bold Mideast trip

Zbigniew Brzezinski and Stephen Solarz think that this whole millenia-of-division thing could pretty well be wrapped up if The Dear Leader would just hop on the plane for a field trip...
To achieve Mideast peace, Obama must make a bold Mideast trip: "President Obama should travel to the Knesset in Jerusalem and the Palestinian Legislative Council in Ramallah to call upon both sides to negotiate a final status agreement based on a specific framework for peace. He should do so in the company of Arab leaders and members of the Quartet, the diplomatic grouping of the United States, Russia, the European Union and the United Nations that is involved in the peace process. A subsequent speech by Obama in Jerusalem's Old City, addressed to all the people in the region and evocative of his Cairo speech to the Muslim world in June 2009, could be the culminating event in this journey for peace."

And then he goes into the Temple, sits down on the altar and declares himself... Oh, sorry... I've been reading ahead. Don't want to spoil it for the rest of you.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Whoring Out The Old Grey Lady

Film - ‘Date Night’ Adventure for Steve Carell and Tina Fey - NYTimes.com

Date Night, a new film starring two quite funny people in what would appear to be a fairly unfunny production, features a quote from the New York Times in its most recent commercial. Two quotes actually and it attributes both of them to the Times. The quotes are:

"an overridingly upbeat film" and "a love letter to marriage"

Now, no quibbles about the former. It appears in the article as quoted. As for it being "a love letter to marriage"...

Well, it may very well be. And the quote certainly appears in the Times article. The only problem is that this quote from the Times appears in the times already in quotes. Why? Because it is a quote from the movie's screenwriter, Josh Klauser.

So what we've got is a screenwriter giving a quote to the New York times and then the studio using that quote to promote the film but ascribing it to the newspaper rather than to the film's own screenwriter.

Now, I can't imagine very many people go to see movies based on these quotes in the commercials. Still, this strikes me as a bit awkward if not unethical.

I'll Take World's Biggest Shit for $1000 Please, Alex

Jon Gosselin files for primary custody of the kids - USATODAY.com

God love this pair. Kate's no walk in the park, but somehow Jon always manages to take it to a new level.

Monday, April 05, 2010

Unilateral Disarmament

Obama Limits When U.S. Would Use Nuclear Arms - NYTimes.com

April 5, 2015

Washington - Three weeks into a massive smallpox outbreak which has claimed nearly 300,000 lives, administration officials speaking on condition of anonymity indicated that no decision has been reached regarding a military response against the nations suspected of having initiated the attack...

Don't fool yourself into thinking this sort of thing doesn't matter. The United States has always reserved the option of responding to biological and chemical attacks with nuclear weapons. Renouncing that option immediately increases the likelihood that American forces and American civilians will come die due to weapons of mass destruction.

If Obama is naive enough (and I fear he actually is) to believe that this sort of statement will discourage states from seeking nuclear weapons he is completely out of touch with reality.

The comparison to Jimmy Carter has been made previously. As with Carter's unilateral renunciation of the neutron bomb, Obama is taking a unilateral step that weakens the security of the United States.

The Vulcans Are Coming... Everyone Look Busy!

First Contact Day - Memory Alpha, the Star Trek Wiki

53 years to go, folks.

Friday, April 02, 2010

The MediaBlog Guide to Prayer

If you're getting ready to eat and you've got the family gathered around and you want to bless the food then for the love of crackers just get on with it and BLESS THE DAMN FOOD!

I mean this isn't the time for praying for Grandpa or for thanking Jesus for dying on the cross or whatever else happens to come into your mind while the chicken is getting cold.  There's definitely a time and a place for that but when everybody is hungry and the food is on the table that ain't it.

If it lasts more than 10 seconds you're doing it wrong.  Just thank Him for the grub and get on with it already.